Friday, August 8, 2014

Day 1 After News

Just to touch base once is now day 3 since the news. I spent the better part of Day 1 at my best friends and my daughters God parents home, Duncan & Christine. As soon as we got out of the car the neighbor's 2 little girls who were outside with their Mom spotted Chloe Megan and that took care of what the kids were doing today LOL..swimming as much as possible!

 I spent a couple of hours with Christine of course talking about my news from my Oncologist but then we just enjoyed seeing each other and catching up. I then changed into my bathing suit and headed for the pool, but not till I blew up the 2 pool mattresses that I bought for myself and Chloe I've been dying to try out :-) Then as planned and anticipated I headed for the pool. This was sure to feel great! I worked up a sweat pumping up the mattresses so now even in spite of the most certain blood chilling cold of the water it will be refreshing and I can bear it till I get myself onto the mattress., or so I thought LOL....the water was colder than I anticipated, but regardless I worked too hard to get this mattress pumped and waited too long for this so just took a deep breath and used my arms to get me in the center of the pool facing the sun, and I floated around , aimlessly daydreaming enjoying the intense heat of the sun toasting up my cold wet body. ;-) The only part of me that I let in the pool was my hands and arms up to just past my elbows LOL..

Chloe remained with her friends the rest of the day till I as promised joined them for some time in the much appreciated heated pool . But before that I enjoyed talking over tea with the Mom of the 2 girls Nadine talking over the benefits of home schooling, and we did a lot of catching up as well.

All in all today was a good day in spite of. I got to be with good friends and family and most and best of all spend quality time with my pride and joy , my daughter Chloe Megan. 

What more could I ever ask for.

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Day 2 After News

Hello all,

It is Day 2 and the weather is strange. I woke up and went out in the yard to check the temperature of the pool and I got side tracked by the smells of the wild flowers and even tho there was a chill in the air, the warmth of the sun on my face and body sent  surge of comfort through me. And just then Chloe Megan came out and walked towards me, stopping to pull a little yellow buttercup type flower she saw along the stone path, and as I watched her pretty face framed in long cascading curls smelling the tiny flower ,looking beautiful in all her innocence, a surge of relief coursed through me ,,,,for the 1st time in a long time I felt and just knew that everything was going to be o.k.

I am happy. The clouds were persistently covering the sun, but it would pass just as quickly. Strange phenomenon is that it rains when the sun is out!..It basically rained at random of and on all day long, clearing up as quickly as it started making it kind of hard to plan outdoor activities. We thought of cycling but didn't  for fear of getting caught in the momentary downpour without any place to seek shelter.And swimming in an already cold water pool was not an option either.
So we just hung out together smelling and picking flowers for awhile.

  Lookin' pretty in pink :-) it's no wonder I am so happy. How can I not be.

Trixie Doodle joining us in the fun ;-)

Think we'll just hang out. Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully it will  be warm enough to go swimming.

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Hello again, 
Sorry it has been awhile, but a lot has been going on. I 've been wanting to write in my Blog so many times but something always seems to come up. 
I promised to keep everyone up to speed about my Cancer and I always keep my promises. About a month ago I had some radiation on my hip, since my Cancer unfotunately metastasized to my pelvic bone and spot on my femur and the pain in my hip was unbelievable! SO I caved and opted for the radiation. I also had a CT Scan, which was long over do and I got the results yesterday. I wasn't surprised that it got worse in those spots in the bone, but what came as a complete surprise was my Doc said that there were some very very small nodules on my lungs :-(..Yeah you read correctly ON MY LUNG!!

OMG the sky is falling or it might as well have been .

Here comes the tears, but I had to fight and stay strong for my daughter;s sake who was right beside me.

My Oncologist didn't seem as bummed out as I was at all. He actually said that he was happy in the sense that it was found really early and with treatment I will be good as new...well almost as good as new lol
 Thank God for small favors. I knew all along that the treatment they had me on wasn't working because my pain in my problem areas in the bone were getting worse and not better. To think , I lost my hair , well it thinned out so much that I started wearing a wig , my white and red cells kept dropping so low after each treatment that there were many times the Chemo was cancelled! So my treatments were far from consistent, and not to mention last but not least , the pain in my bones was above and beyond! There were moments where I shook the pain got so bad!

I called my Mom in New York and my best friends and God parents to my daughter and of course my boyfriend to tell him the news, and they are such a great support for me and my little girl. So much so my best friends asked if I wanted them to come and pick me and Chloe Megan up and bring us back to their place. I used to live there years ago when I was first diagnosed and Chloe Megan was only a babe in diapers. They have a beautiful pool that Chloe loves!\

Since I already started with supper and everything and it was after 8:30 pm I thought that going today (Wednesday) early in the day would be better. This was we have the entire day to enjoy the sun and pool.

So now I wait for my Doc or Pivot Nurse Andrea to call and tell me when I am to start the new Chemo which is called Taxol. It is supposed to be very good. From what my Doc said he is thinking that it would be better to give me the chemo in small doses every day , I am still not sure for how many weeks tho, as opposed to giving me a very strong dose once or twice a week for several weeks. My best friend Tine is off work these days and offered to watch over Chloe Megan for me while I go for treatments. It will be so much easier for me and a lot more fun for Chloe Megan instead of having to come along with me EVERY DAY for God knows how many weeks. This way can have peace of mind knowing that while I am taking care of myself and getting my treatments, she will be having lots of fun with Melanie and Nicholas swimming and playing :-)

I will kick this Cancer's Ass if it is the last thing that I do! I've manged to survive it for over 8 yrs now and I intend to beat it for good! As my late Grandfather used to say," Enough is Enough!" LOL